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Most 1:1s fail because they become status updates. Here's how to make them the most valuable 30 minutes of the week.
The agenda belongs to your direct report first. Ask them what they want to cover. Your items come second. This signals trust and shifts the dynamic from reporting to thinking-out-loud.
Nothing communicates "you're not a priority" faster than a cancelled 1:1. If your calendar is chaotic, shorten it to 20 minutes — but protect it. Consistency is the foundation of trust.
When someone says "things are fine," that's often where the conversation starts. Practice sitting with silence after you ask. Most people will fill it with something real.
Reference what someone said last week. Pick up unfinished threads. It shows you were listening and that what they said mattered. It's a small act that builds enormous trust over time.
Whose court is it in? What's the timeline? 1:1s without clear actions tend to feel good in the moment but fade fast. A single clear commitment closes the loop and sets up next week.
Not every 1:1 needs to be a career conversation — but some should be. Rotate through check-ins, project discussions, feedback exchanges, and development conversations throughout the month.
Regardless of format or length, high-quality 1:1s share the same four foundations.
Your direct report can say what's actually true without editing themselves. This is built over months, not manufactured in a single meeting.
Both parties know what's being covered. No surprises. If you're going to give hard feedback, say so in advance — don't ambush people.
You remember what was said last time. Threads are followed up on. Actions are closed. This transforms 1:1s from conversations into an ongoing relationship.
"How's it going?" invites one-word answers. "What's been hardest this week?" invites honesty. The quality of your questions determines the quality of your conversations.
True Good Advisory helps growing companies develop the managers they already have — through structured programs, coaching, and 1:1 feedback frameworks.
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